đż We are going through tough times right now but amidst the difficulties, we are seeing amazing unity between people, communities and nations. More than ever we are all working together and stepping up to help the vulnerable and people in need.
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Our government and major banks are also following suit and have prepared packages for those of us who are without work and are experiencing financial strains of different kinds.
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We are forced to go back to basics. A great lesson will come out of this terrible situation which is affecting everyone around the globe in an unprecedented way. We can truly say that we are all touched by this in one form or another. ALL of us, without exception. Rich or poor, and everything in between, this is the great equalizer.
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We are coming to the realization of what really matters in life: connection, food, shelter. The fluff is no longer important or essential.
When planning for this pandemic, what comes to mind? Do I have enough food? Enough medication? What can I do to stay active physically and stay safe? What can I do with my kids? How can I keep busy at low or no cost while confined to my house? How do I work from home? What can I do if I have no work?
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It has forced us to be creative, resourceful, reach out and ask for help, as well as reach out and offer help to those in need. It has forced us to redirect where we spend our money. Prioritize our health over material things. It has forced us to learn to cooperate and look beyond our belly button. To look outside of us and see that we are all connected and that the choices we make have an impact on more than just ourselves. Our choices, big or small, have a ripple effect to a greater extent than we can ever imagine.
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This virus is a wake-up call. It has forced us to live in a way that is more sustainable. Shop locally, stop overspending on things (or you wonât have anything left for emergencies), eat whole foods, donât waste, save some for others, share, help, unite, have proper hygiene because we can make ourselves and others sick, connect with your kids and do less, embrace simplicity and the basics in life. Basically, this will force many to re-evaluate their values, what matters most and the choices they will make from now on.
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The world, while still turning, has forced us to come to a halt. In the meantime, animals in nature are coming out to play because we are no longer a threat. We are now the ones in captivity and living in fear. The tables have been turned on us. It has been clear in the past few years that something had to give and that we needed to wake up.
We had multiple nudges but it wasnât enough. People did not listen⌠now they are forced to. The world as we knew it is no longer. We cannot turn a blind eye and expect it will have no impact. It will catch up with us, whether we want to or not, in some way or another.
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Many are still in denial about the gravity of the situation and they are still placing people at risk unnecessarily. It is sad. Our society has become very self-centered and self-serving and some are already paying the price. This will need to shift. We all need to do our part and think of the impact of our individual choices and decisions on the whole. Whether it be relating to how we raise our children, how we treat the environment and other people, who we vote for and what companies we support.
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As we go through this massive global shift, it is important more than ever to come together and be agents of change. And this starts in our families. So, for now, we are all confined to our homes and we are forced to be creative, deal with each other, respect each otherâs spaces, learn to cope, basically.
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Once the novelty wears off, we will see stress levels increase. We need to prepare for this and instead, set in place prevention strategies⌠Stop being reactive and be proactive.
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How do we do this?
Create routines and rituals for you and your children. It brings stability and reduces stress.
For now, this is the new normal, so stop resisting it, accept it, and make adaptive choices to THIS new normal. Stop resisting, it will make it much harder for you to be resourceful.
If you have to work from home, have a designated space. Even if that space is small and cannot be behind closed doors. Designate an area and tell people around you that when you are in that space you are not to be disturbed.
Take a lunch break and a couple of breaks during the workday. And shut down at the end of your workday.
Respect each otherâs style: introverts need time away & alone to recharge, extraverts need time with others to recharge. Donât take it personally, it is not a rejection. Give each other that space.
Keep up the self-care, exercising from home (change your routine- find a new way).
Donât numb out on TV or screens all the time. Trust me, it will creep up on you and you will feel dissatisfied with life.
Go on a news diet. Really limit it to the minimum and the necessary. There is no need to keep updated on the latest mortality rates. You are stuck at home. Stay safe and healthy. Get the news that is useful (e.g., government aid, assistance programs, helpful warnings and advice). No need to look at the news that will just make you more anxious. It is not useful. You are just traumatizing your brain over and over again.
Do NOT expose your children to the news and educate your teens about this as well.
Get involved in creative projects, no matter what they are. Whether it is art, models, puzzles, drawing, music, dance, cooking, taking apart a small engine, science projects, journaling, scrapbooking, collecting, knitting, sewing, writing, etc⌠the sky is the limit on how we can get creative and engage the mind. This becomes your meditation. You get in the flow and this is very calming.
Practice mindfulness, meditation, gratitude, yoga, tai chi, walk in nature⌠they are all calming and grounding for the mind and the body.
Work as a team in the house. Assign chores, tasks etc. Help each other. Kids need to learn life skills, civics and ethicsâŚÂ
Get the App Insight Timer on your phone or tablet. It is simply amazing. It is FREE. They donât advertise and that is why many people donât know about it. Save money and use this free app which has podcasts, guided meditations for all kinds of issues (for children and adults). It is quite complete.
Focus on the positive. Do not live in fear. It will reduce your immunity. We donât want that. The health care system is already taxed enough. Practice stress management and teach your family as well. No good comes out of stress.
Join this community if you need support. It is a positive community that I and a friend, Richard Robins, a wonderful social worker, lead. Ottawaâs Pandemic Mental Health Support Group is on Facebook.
So, thatâs it for now. Stay safe everyone, practice social distancing but keep in touch with loved ones. And, finally, embrace this special time. Good will come out of it and try to see the silver lining.
đżP.S.: If your children are struggling with fear or anxiety I have posted 3 guided meditations for children 6 to 12 yo. They are narrated by my daughter when she was 6 and 11. Go to the App Insight Timer and you will find them there.  A review on iTunes would help people find us!! I would really appreciate it.
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đżANNOUNCEMENT.: I’ve been working diligently on my membership site. It will be chock-full of resources of all kinds (online courses, audios, videos, PDFs, book recommendations, resources, helpful lessons AND an online community where we can connect and ask questions, Q & A calls).
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Those who know me, know that I aim to serve, so please submit any suggestions of content you would love to see in there or in my newsletter.
đż Is it week 4 or 5? I lose track. Is it Monday or Sunday? Who knows. The days are looking more and more the same đ. In my case, they are looking more and more like weekends!
Okay, we are now kinda settling into our new reality. For some, it is easier than others. Adjusting to social distancing, quarantine, taking extra precautions, dealing with working from home while taking care of children, job loss, being away from loved ones, or simply feeling alone are some of the many new realities we have to deal with.
It is a welcome break for some while for others it is a highly stressful period. And I include myself in all this!
I have a lot more time on my hands that I was anticipating. So I decided might as well use this time for good!  đŚ
As many of you know I lead a FB group with a friend of mine, Richard Robins, social worker extraordinaire. The group is open to everyone around the globe, called Ottawaâs Pandemic Mental Health Support Group. I pop in there to support people with questions, resources, positivity. A few other awesome practitioners are part of the group to help out (psychologists, naturopathic doctors, volunteers etc).
Anyhow, I digress. We have hosted some FB lives and we will be having another one Tuesday. More specifically it will be relating to helping people cope with the new reality of the pandemic and how it has affected their lives.
Myself and a colleague, Glenn Ambrose, will be answering your questions. So I am asking you to submit your questions if you cannot make it live. We will make it our mission to answer as many questions as possible.
There are no stupid questions. Your questions might help someone else who is too shy to ask. You do not need to be identified.
We will also be talking about a course we will be launching next week to help people like you and I cope.
We are doing the course as our way to give back. It will be highly discounted, just to cover our costs. We know, many people out there have lost jobs or are simply in a tight spot financially. Maybe you or someone you know might benefit from our course. Stay tuned.
When is the FB live?
Tuesday, April 21, 6h30PM- EST
You can send your questions by replying to this email, email [email protected], submit them to the FB group or message me on FB or LinkedIn.
So, thatâs it for now. Stay safe everyone, practice social distancing but keep in touch with loved ones. And, finally, embrace this special time.
đď¸Â Good will come out of it and try to see the silver lining.  đď¸
đżP.S.: If your children are struggling with fear or anxiety I have posted 3 guided meditations for children 6 to 12 yo. They are narrated by my daughter when she was 6 and 11. Go to the App Insight Timer and you will find them there. Â A review on iTunes would help people find us!! I would really appreciate it.
đżP.S.2.:Â Join this community if you need support. It is a positive community that I and a friend, Richard Robins, a wonderful social worker, lead. Ottawaâs Pandemic Mental Health Support Group is on Facebook.
This visualization is narrated by my daughter (11 years old). It will help your child settle down if they experience worries or anxiety. Have them become quiet and you may do a whole-body relaxation beforehand.
Source: The Relaxation & Stress Reduction Workbook for Kids (Shapiro & Sprague, 2009)
Let me tell you this. Every single choice you make matters!
Are you spending more time taking care of other people than of yourself?
 As a result of being such an independent, fierce, productive woman, who can do it all, does it seems like you are not getting the support that you need?
 Self-love is at the core of all the choices we make. And boundaries are the foundation for proper self-care.Â
What are you willing to accept from others and where do you draw the line? Â
 We teach people how to treat us. And if we donât value ourselves, our time, or our health, why would others?Â
 Your actions speak louder than your words. Your boundaries are a reflection of your level of self-love and self-esteem.Â
 If your boundaries are loose, you are signaling that you value others more than you do yourself.
Having healthy boundaries means asking for what we want in all spheres of our lives: work, family, kids, partners, friends.Â
 To be happy and successful at anything in your life you need to put yourself first and then you can take care of everyone else.Â
 If you donât love yourself, you will betray yourself over and over again. With time it will wear at your mind, body and soulâŚ
This is why, as Caroline Myss says, people donât heal. Because they are not willing to face the truth.
Did you know that self-esteem, boundaries and choices are all inter-connected?
 If youâre not sure and want to experience it first hand, try this out for a week or two and notice if there has been a shift:
First step: Awareness. đStart paying attention to ALL the choices you make throughout the day, big AND small. And notice the consequence of the choices you have just made. If you can journal about it to keep track. We easily forget!Â
Every single choice we make has an impact. Trust me!
Second step: Stop and think. đNow that you realize how many choices we make in a single day. Take a second or two and notice the choice you are about to make and ask yourself this question:
Is what Iâm about to do reflective of self-love or love of the other, or is it a choice based on fear or guilt or a sense of obligation?Â
Third step:Action. đNow it is time to actually go into action. Youâve determined if this choice was out of love or not. If it is not, are you willing to pass, say no, set a boundary to honour yourself?Â
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Still hesitating, then ask yourself âIf I wasnât scared or did not feel guilty or obligated, what would I do?â And do it!
Fourth step: Taking responsibility. đ If you were able to make a choice based on self-love. Thatâs awesome. Keep it up. You will reap the benefits, no doubt about it.Â
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If you still struggle with fear, guilt or sense of obligation, and let these emotions make the choices for you. Thatâs awesome too!Â
Huh? You wonder. Well yes. Now you know the source of your stress, overwhelm, burnt out, depression, anxiety⌠you name it.Â
You get to turn your life around NOW!Â
Before I let you go, keep this quote in mind:
âThe life you have today is based on the choices you made yesterday and the life you will have tomorrow is based on the choices you make today.â
If you want to find happiness, be mindful of the choices you make. They matter more than you think!
đżP.S.: Don’t miss my bi-weeklypodcast episodes and submit questions or topics of interest. Episodes 6 & 13 are relevant to today’s topic. A review on iTunes would help people find us!!
đżANNOUNCEMENT.: I’ve been working diligently on my membership site. It will be chock-full of resources of all kinds (online courses, audios, videos, PDFs, helpful lessons AND an online community where we can connect and ask questions, Q & A calls). All at a really affordable monthly price for those who cannot afford one-on-one coaching.Â
Those who know me, know that I aim to serve, so please submit any suggestions of content you would love to see in there or in my newsletter.
Wishing you all a â¨Happy New Year â¨and Health â¤ď¸above all else. The rest will naturally follow!
I get it. In this day and age of instant gratification, everything moving at the speed of light and the pressure from peers and society to be highly productive, you might be wonderingâŚ
âWhere does the time go?â
For me, I get caught up in the busy-ness of being a mom and my career. I can easily get distracted with a pile of chores and obligations and an endless to-do list.
We compare ourselves to others and feel we need to keep up, leaving us energetically drained, overwhelmed and possibly feeling as though life is passing you by.Â
Am I striking a chord?
If I am, I want you to know there IS a better way! Let me explain…
The first step is to stop the spin cycle and start making YOU the priority in your life again.
Admittedly, life was simpler 100 years ago. With no technology, things moved much slower. Not that people didnât work hard, it was more about fewer things distracting us and filling our mind on a 24/ 7 basis.
For example, whatâs the first thing you do when you lay down to rest after work?
Maybe close your eyes for a minute – and most likely pick up your phone/ tablet to check messages and surf the net…am I right?
Hereâs the thing…just like a hundred years ago, we still only have 24 hours in a day. Yet we try to cram in more than is humanly healthy or even possible.
We spend more time up in our heads than we do in our hearts – no wonder you might be spinning all the time.
If you havenât unplugged and taken the time to just BE present, thereâs no way to access whatâs truly in your heart.
How do you do that? Well, let me tell you how.
Take time to âsmell the rosesâ. Stop and actually notice what is right in front of you and take it in. I mean it, truly take it in!
Savour that coffee and taste it. Sip it slowly. Smell its aroma. Pause. Close your eyes and really taste and smell it. Donât multitask.
Take a moment to notice your beautiful space, that smile on your childâs face, your partner lying next to you. Be in that moment fully. Be truly present.
This simple daily ritual will make you feel more grounded and connected to the people around you. If you do this throughout your day, your stress levels will go down.
The next step is to carve out 15-30 minutes just for you first thing in the morning. If you have to, get up before everyone else. Donât grab your phone as soon as you open your eyes.
Before you dial into production mode, create a morning ritual as a gift to yourself. Doing things just for you. Be in the receiving mode.
Youâll notice the benefits add up over time. It will set the tone for the day. You will feel energized and you will take better care of yourself.
As the last step, a few times a day, start noticing what you are thinking about and how you are feeling.Â
Half the time we are not present and we are lost in our thoughts. Worrying, planning, ruminating, replaying. You name it.
Stop the time travelling and bring yourself back to this moment in time. Just immerse yourself fully into what you are doing without allowing your mind to wander elsewhere.
 The easiest way to do that is to place your focus on the information inputted by your five senses. Right now.Â
Stay there a while. Youâll see. In that place, there is no struggle or resistance.
See your relationships improve. Life has more meaning. You will be happier.
Try these steps out and keep me posted on the results you notice.
P.S.: Don’t miss my bi-weeklypodcast episodes and submit questions or topics of interest
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